Hi,
Do you ever wonder what your relationship with money is?
Or if it is a healthy relationship?
Or is there a healthy respect for finance in your relationship?
Many of us have strong negative associations with money, which can manifest in our life for many different reasons.
Maybe...
you grew up being told that money is the root of all evil
you grew up being told money doesn't grow on trees
you grew up and saw your parents struggling because they fell on hard times financially
you grew up being told money can't buy happiness
you grew up being told that rich people are selfish and greedy
you grew up being told that poor people are giving and selfless
you grew up believing that money was in one hand and out the other
With absolutely no blame or shame directed at my parents when I say this, I know that I can relate to many of the things I have listed.
My parents who I love and respect, had great values on many levels, but like so many others, they often associated money with a negative energy or outcome.
This resulted in instilling fear of lack and limitation about money in me.
And perhaps some of these misguided deep seeded beliefs I held subconsciously, made me vulnerable to losing everything in an abusive relationship where financial abuse was rife.
The subject of money and financial security is still something that I am working on rebuilding and strengthening, after having to start again from scratch.
When coming from a place of absolute vulnerability where the memories of just scraping by week to week are still fresh in your mind, like they are for me, it is easy for self-doubt to creep in and for me to sometimes question whether it is possible to recover.
Financial abuse is often part of abusive relationships as it is a way to control women and keep them in the cycle of abuse.
Click this link to read more about the signs of financial abuse in relationships.
I am sharing this information with you about healing from financial abuse because Mamamia Media Group recently interviewed me on the subject of financial abuse within relationships.
And I want you to know, that although things may look hopeless, I do know that it is possible recover; there is evidence in my life all around that this is the case.
The biggest lesson for me, is to keep focused on the facts, not the fears.
The fact that I have established a healthy cash flow, that we have financial stability, and that my life is rich and abundant in many ways.
And I remind myself often, not to focus on my fears of lack and scarcity, and not to let myself stay in a poverty mindset, when insecurities about money rise up.
I hope that by opening up about my negative experiences with money in the past, that this will help other women like me see that there can be a way, to not only change the association you have with money, but turn things around financially for the better, and start a new positive narrative about finance.
Affirmations can play a big role in helping to reprogram our subconscious beliefs. If you are struggling to think about ever getting on top of your money issues, start saying the affirmation below.
And when you say it, try to feel the truth of this. You are worthy of financial security.
If you would like to read the Mamamia Article, about Financial Abuse, in which I was featured, click the link below.
There are organisations and institutions like the bank in the article who provide help and support to women who are dealing with financial abuse.
Don't feel embarrassed for reaching out to others for help and support.
For some time I was linked into a debt support organisation. They helped me when I was unable to break free from the cycle of abuse to get a list of organisations I owed money to because the financial abuse, and they made arrangements for payment installment plans to pay these debts off in a timely manner. They also took a small amount from my regular income to set aside for "rainy day savings" for me, which came in useful when I needed to move house.
There were even times where I asked for help from community services for things like petrol vouchers. It is much better to receive help than to suffer alone in silence.
There are many forms of financial assistance available and if you have trouble finding them organisations like 1800RESPECT who can help link you into services and organisations for help in this area (Australian service - look for a similar service in your area if you are outside of Australia, or ask me for help if you get stuck)
Click the link below for 1800RESPECT
Don't bury your head in the sand and wait for things to go from bad to worse.
Reach out and get some help.
I am here to support you. Click the link below to book a one on one call with me.
I would love to hear your thoughts about this subject.
Conversations about money and helping women to regain control of their finances and their lives is invaluable.
Sending you love and light and wishing you well,
Sandy J
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